I’ll never forget the feelings I had during freshman orientation. I remember meeting all these kids I’ve never seen before and trying to remember their names before we were off to the next activity. There were relay races, speakers, and I think information on the dangers of drugs and alcohol. Despite some of the corny ice breakers that we had to do all in all I remember it being a pretty good time.
My brother was a junior in high school already and a pretty big guy so let’s just say I felt comfortable walking around the halls. The senior girls looked like my mom’s friends, and I wondered out loud how it was possible that some of the guys had full beards in high school. As a freshman you realize pretty quickly where you stand on the totem pole. The totem pole does not go horizontally, its vertical and at the very bottom beneath the sophomores are the freshmen.
I hated the fact that I had a two year wait before I became relevant. The sophomore class was just a transition period to being an upperclassman. No freshman feared or worried too much about someone that was just a year older than they were. On top of that the sophomores were in the same boat that we were in. No one knew their names either. Most of my first day at high school was spent trying to find my classroom, and listening to my friends talk about girls like it was their first time seeing one not on television.
The girls that were now “hot” in middle school became nonexistent pretty quickly in high school. The stud football player realized that these grown men hit a lot harder. The class genius was now faced with the dilemma that half the school was smarter than or just as smart as he/she was. Being a freshman was not only a wakeup call, but also a search for relevance.
It was like the wild wild west, you wanted to have a name at the school. If an upperclassman said what’s up to you as he walked away with his jeans jacket collar up you felt pretty cool. I was known as “Romonts brother”, that was my name for the first two years. I doubt most the upperclassman even knew what my real name was. At that period in time I was about 5ft 6 (6ft 4) now and 140lbs (245lbs) now so being known as “Romonts brother” was just fine for me. Throw in the fact that I was already a master of sarcasm at an early age and that title saved my life more times than I can count.
Other freshman tried different ways to get noticed. They would try to go to parties and hold their weight with the big boys and girls. The girls would hook up with seniors just so someone would know who they were. The boys would get into fights and try to prove that they were tough. All the while the upperclassman would sit back and laugh knowing a secret that we as freshman wouldn’t know until later down the road. We would always just be freshman to them. There’s nothing we could have done or said that would change how they viewed us that year. They knew this because they went down the same path we were going down and recognized the pattern.
If you think about it we become freshman throughout our entire lives. We’re in a constant search to prove our worth to other people. After four years of high school guess what we are again? That’s right ladies and gentleman we’re back to being freshman. Awesome! Well after college we’re not freshman anymore right? Wrong!! What do you think that entry level job you just started at makes you? Exactly. The term “upperclassmen” is replaced with “upper management” and there we are busting our humps trying to get noticed again.
One thing I learned in this process is that the time we spend trying to impress the people at the top of the totem pole could have been used trying to convince ourselves we’re not at the bottom. Who I am isn’t determined by my grade, my salary, or how many beers I can drink; who I am is who I believe I am.
I went to Wilson in Long Beach, this just took me back and boy do I not want to remember. Good ending. But most kids don’t think like that. I didn’t look to impress then, I never have which is on a different level for HS.
So full of wisdom and insight – and so astutely assessed ! In an ever-changing world, to progress in life, some change is imperative. With that change, we often find ourselves on the bottom of a new ladder. Self belief, perspective and fortitude will carry us through – but what a shame so many don’t learn that lesson much earlier in life.